I Reached My Breaking Point Because Of The Officer’s Child.

I Finally Reached My Breaking Point

Looking Back

It’s my day off and I can’t help but, think about what transpired and why I reached my breaking point because of the officer’s child. I work for someone who causes utter craziness in our department. It’s been a rough year, to say the least! Although, I do know there is a purpose in all this.

The hissing, whispers of the creature are lurking about causing me to reverse my entire mindset. The beast bite releases a paralyzing venom into its victim (me) and it isn’t long before doubt begins to dull my sense of well-being. I have fallen prey to this attack. The beast displays no mercy and laughs at the crippled condition as it prepares for numerous other assaults.

The Beast In The Officer’s Child

Have you tried working for a company where their present employee fights tooth and nail to deter you from taking the position you interviewed for? This particular organization refuses to follow employment laws especially when it comes to an employed officer’s child.

Let me explain all that transpired before, during, and after. I will need time to explain everything in great detail and it won’t be just in this post but many more to follow.

Interview Time

I arrived 15 minutes early for the interview, I waited in the waiting area for an hour. That’s when the HR director came down and apologized for the long delay.

We walked upstairs together and in our discussion to the conference room, we found out we knew one another from another organization we both worked at. He did HR and I received supervisor training from him.

Anyway, I had an interview with a panel of three; two men and an officer’s child.

Despised By The Officer’s Child

As I walked through the doors of the conference room to find the place I was to sit. I watched the officer’s child’s facial expressions change various ways and at various times.

The facial expressions were the first thing I experienced especially when it came to the refusal to accept that the officer’s child’s friend wouldn’t be getting the job.

Delays Upon Delays

I tried not to get caught up in what continued to manifest from the officer’s child’s non-follow-ups and the lack of timely response and multiple non-follow-ups with me.

Then, the constant continued delays and lies started with this officer’s child when it came to my employment references she said she needed to further the process. This officer’s child said my references hadn’t come over, and then the next delay this officer’s child said my references were not responding.

This officer’s child didn’t know who I knew that was part of hiring me for this position. I had bible study with the spouse of the officer who interviewed me for the position. This officer’s child was overruled and continued to fulfill her mission to rid herself of me.

This officer’s child attempted to delay offering the position to me and said she had to get back to me. She even phoned me on various occasions asking if my family would be okay with me taking this position and how it may affect my family and even tried offering me another position that paid less and something I didn’t even apply for.

Position Filled

I finally received the offer letter with a start date, which enabled me to give my current employer of nine years my two-week notice.

Before my start date, I received numerous phone calls asking if I still wanted the position to understand all that it entails, and so forth.

Then, the day I’m to report to work the officer’s child calls me to have me change my work attire to go into the field versus the office then, calls me back again to say things have changed and I will come into the office. Then, due to HR paperwork delays on her end, I had to rush through my new hire paperwork to end my day late with no time for lunch or dinner.

No Place To Work Because Of The Officer’s Child

There was nothing in place for me to work from or with. Not even an office or computer. I was asked to go through a filing cabinet on the other side of the building and organize everything it. Then she proceeded to delegate me to go through her office and pack boxes for a move to another area of the building.

Later on in the week she and her friend pulled me into her office and proceeded to close the door and she proceeded to tell me that someone there had a problem with me and that she would deal with it later. Then, hands me a ball cap. I left feeling uncomfortable, to say the least. How’s that for your first week on the job?

I finally reached my breaking point
I finally reached my breaking point when it came to the officer’s child

Unsettling Patterns

  • Have you ever worked with someone who is all over the place in their thoughts and actions? 
  • How did that work out for you? 

Having to have my phone on 24 hours a day, seven days a week is beyond rational! Can I even continue working these 15 to 19 hour days?

The Hotel

  • It’s Sunday, and I’m being told I have to drive out of town for work and I must stay in the hotel a fellow employee booked for me.
  • The day before I had gotten home late from work and I was told that I was not needed for the EDS work that was set to start on Sunday.
  • Meanwhile, I was up at 4:40 a.m. on Sunday going about my business to get, an email and being told that my working on Sunday had been the plan all along.
On The Road Again

I had to come home after my plans to pack fast to hit the road. I had a four and half hour drive ahead of me. When I finally at the hotel it was around 11:30 p.m.

It was nearly impossible to fall asleep, my body needed time to shut down from the long drive. I woke up exhausted. 

Plus, the turmoil I went through with this officer’s child. This officer’s child threatened to charge me for my hotel room if I did not show up as directed. This officer’s child sent an email to a bunch of people threatening me with insubordination. Meanwhile, I had been working for a month straight. This officer’s child told me I couldn’t take my vacation, the vacation I had planned for a year.

The Mind

My mind would not shut off long enough for me to fall asleep or stay asleep. So, let’s just say I got about three hours of sleep that night.

After I did what I needed to do that next morning (which involved more craziness) due to my boss’s inability to plan. I headed out. On my way home, my arms and hands started to tingle and felt numb so I decided it was important to pull over. I notified my boss, her boss, and HR via email.

As I sat in the car, my emotions started to pour out of me. I asked God why and how can a person like this do this to me. I can’t deal with them any longer! Why am I allowing them to affect my health and well-being, this is unacceptable!

Eventually, I decided I was okay enough to get back on the road and as I was driving and listening to my radio playing Christian music and listening to Christian preaching. I really hoped it would get my mind off all that manifested.

Emotional Effects

As I continued driving I realized I wasn’t getting any better. So, I started looking for shelter. I saw a hotel and took that exit, parked my car, and unpacked my car. As I walked into the entrance of the hotel and up to the front desk of a hotel, I could barely stand. I felt weak and weary and I was short of breath.

Breaking Point Breached

As soon as I got to my room and lay down I emailed my boss, her boss, and, HR. I told them I needed to pull over and get some rest, I needed sleep and I didn’t know what was going on with my arms, hands numbness and tingling.

Shortly, after the email went out my boss’s boss phoned me out of concern for my health and well-being.  I said, I am beyond exhausted and I need to take care of myself. He asked if he could pray for me. I said, most definitely. He asked that I call him letting him know how I am feeling a bit later. That is when another email went out from my boss. Things continued to get worse!

Fear Of The Officer’s Child

Have you ever met this beast? It creeps in like feelings of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of rejection, fear of unemployment, fear of what others are saying about you, fear of having to move away.

Lurking around every imaginable corner threatens to poison our inner peace. Another name is bully which relies on scare tactics and surprise attacks.

Watching for my vulnerable moments when it submerges itself into my self-esteem and turns my mind to mental mush leaving me less and less bright and cherry

Feeling overcast and not knowing what is over the horizon, the fear fog takes hold. Things will be difficult to shake for some time.


Light, space, zest – that’s God! So, with him on my side I’m fearless, afraid of no one and nothing. When vandal hordes ride down ready to eat me alive, Those bullies and toughs fall flat on their faces. When besieged, I’m calm as a baby. When all hell breaks loose, I’m collected and cool. I’m asking God for one thing, only one thing: To live with him in his house my whole life long. I’ll contemplate his beauty; I’ll study at his feet. That’s the only quiet, secure place in a noisy world, The perfect getaway, far from the buzz of traffic. God holds me head and shoulders above all who try to pull me down. I’m headed for his place to offer anthems that will raise the roof! Already I’m singing God-songs; I’m making music to God. Listen, God, I’m calling at the top of my lungs: “Be good to me! Answer me!” When my heart whispered, “Seek God,” my whole being replied, “I’m seeking him!” Don’t hide from me now! You’ve always been right there for me; don’t turn your back on me now. Don’t throw me out, don’t abandon me; you’ve always kept the door open. My father and mother walked out and left me, but God took me in. Point me down your highway, God; direct me along a well-lighted street; show my enemies whose side you’re on. Don’t throw me to the dogs, those liars who are out to get me, filling the air with their threats. I’m sure now I’ll see God’s goodness in the exuberant earth. Stay with God! Take heart. Don’t quit. I’ll say it again: Stay with God.

God doesn’t want us to be shy with his gifts, but bold and loving and sensible.

“I, I’m the One comforting you. What are you afraid of – or who? Some man or woman who’ll soon be dead? Some poor wretch destined for dust? You’ve forgotten me, God, who made you, who unfurled the skies, who founded the earth. And here you are, quaking like an aspen before the tantrums of a tyrant who thinks he can kick down the world. But what will come of the tantrums? The victims will be released before you know it. They’re not going to die. They’re not even going to go hungry. For I am God, your very own God, who stirs up the sea and whips up the waves, named God-of-the-Angel-Armies. I teach you how to talk, word by word, and personally watch over you, Even while I’m unfurling the skies, setting earth on solid foundations, and greeting Zion: ‘Welcome, my people!'”

Green Kid Crafts

Youth Crafts

What indoor craft activities do you have planned out for your littles?

Nocturnal Animals Box
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Weather Science Box – $34.95
from: Green Kid Crafts

Thinking ahead when it comes to fall; what activities do you plan on doing?

Crisp, frosty mornings ahead is something I look forward to it will be a refreshing change from the oppressively hot afternoons and sweltering nights.


Adult Crafts and Activities

It’s time to gain a new perspective when it comes to the ability to keep warm. My son has been diligent about cutting wood and locating wood for some projects to do in the not to distant future.

Season of Reflection

In a short span of time our family reunification will be changing in the coming weeks. My mind strolls along the back roads of my mind as I think about what, where and why it all came to be.

My memory nevers fails to assist me in evaluating the way we were and established the way we want to be now.

This all implies change, hope, trust and comfort in this uncomfortable situation that will be at the forefront very soon.

Incredible Consistency

Leaves are starting to fall upon the ground, these leaves will soon turn into our mulch for our seasonal gardening. The birds are journeying as the squirrels finish storing their nuts and the bears start to shelter in place.

Creatures in the natural world act out their pageants without external instruction or some script to follow.

God graciously moves upon our lives in seasons and our hearts, patiently He waits for change to begin in us.

The Roots Grow Deep When The Winds Are Strong

At the root of God’s agenda is His promise…

God Who began the good work within you will keep right on helping you grown in His grace until His work within you is finally finished on that day when jesus Christ returns.

He plans to deepen you and strengthen you. But He won’t overdo it. He’s watching over the roots

Come wind, come weather, welcome Autumn with some new crafts and activities.

Health That Is Full Of Nature

Our Focus

It’s time to focus on our health right here and right now.

Health Adventures

Adventures can be unusual and exciting when it comes to our health and this is where a nature-derived life of wellness living is here to help you experience some unusual and exciting ways to live out your life.


How we started and how we must continue to forge ahead in difficult times. The stories I will share will involve all the trials and tribulations I and others have experienced. It is my hope that you will find hope and inspiration through my and my family’s experiences.

Our mindset should be about listening and sharing openly our stories for everyone to hear and learn from. I know it won’t be easy for some of us.


A sign and a twinge of fatigue is deep weariness. The pace, the incessant activity, the noise, deadlines, and the demands we are faced with in our daily lives. In these, we experience feelings of failure. Our natural tendency is to say, “I give up!” and this of course is the dangerous extreme of being “weary.”

Growing weary is a consequence of waiting, fighting the enemy.

I am worn out from my groaning. All night long I flood my bed with weeping and drench my couch with tears. My eyes grow weak with sorrow; they fail because of all my foes.

Our strength has its limits when it comes to our health

The Master, God, has given me a well-taught tongue, So I know how to encourage tired people. He wakes me up in the morning, Wakes me up, opens my ears to listen as one ready to take orders.

Why would you ever complain, O Jacob,
    or, whine, Israel, saying,
“God has lost track of me.
    He doesn’t care what happens to me”?
Don’t you know anything? Haven’t you been listening?
God doesn’t come and go. God lasts.
    He’s Creator of all you can see or imagine.
He doesn’t get tired out, doesn’t pause to catch his breath.
    And he knows everything, inside and out.
He energizes those who get tired,
    gives fresh strength to dropouts.
For even young people tire and drop out,
    young folk in their prime stumble and fall.
But those who wait upon God get fresh strength.
    They spread their wings and soar like eagles,
They run and don’t get tired,
    they walk and don’t lag behind.

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

For he himself is our peace, who has made us both one and has broken down in his flesh the dividing wall of hostility.

Your Wall

I call this a chisel of time that you owe yourself. It’s a way to chisel away at the wall that you have formed around yourself.

In place of our exhaustion and fatigue, he will give us rest that is if we go to Him!

mental health
mental health

Health Transformation


It’s time to make some life-changing improvements.

  • Life – we must learn to make time for some life-changing self-esteem-improving events that are full of what we call adventures. What I truly mean is I want you to take an adventure into nature.
  • Nature – find a spot to sit back and soak up everything that surrounds you. I would honestly say the sound of water is the most fulfilling.
  • Location – the location you chose should be where you can sit back, relax, journal, paint, draw, meditate, and pray the day away.

How To Transform Your Life

  • Venture out and do some life-changing adventures.
  • Invest in your health and your well-being.
  • Learn some new ways that will help you cope with all of the trials and tribulations that have come and gone in your life.
  • Learn how to grieve.

Fill yourself up with some amazing life-changing self-esteem-improving adventures. Understand that this will require your involvement. Involvement means commitment.

Health Steps

Taking on a new adventure is choosing the adventure that you want to take.

Safe To Engage is to learn how to choose a person who is safe for you to engage with them about your struggles.

Life-Changing events that are happening in your life right now or shortly. What types of hobbies are you interested in doing? Doing some digital art can lead you to inspiration.

Self-Driven or Not? learn some new ways how you can be more self-driven.

Healed – learn how to truly heal.

Achievement – It’s in the details, learn how to adopt a new lifestyle where you can thrive.

life-changing self-esteem-improving adventures that will transform your life and your home life. Man meditating in nature
mental health

We must learn to make time for some life-changing self-esteem improving events that are full of what we call adventures. What I truly mean is I want you to take an adventure into nature.

The location you chose should be where you can sit back, relax, journal, paint, draw, meditate, and pray the day away. Sit back and soak up everything that surrounds you. I would honestly say the sound of water is the most fulfilling.

Learn How To Be Healthy Again

  • Achieve a healthy new lifestyle
  • Practice a new way of healing
  • Learn a bit about yourself
  • Learn new ways of coping in life
  • Learn how to tame your anger
  • Learn how to be a better caregiver
  • Learn some unforgettable new ways to live life

Adventure out for your health and your well-being. Learn new activities that will help you cope with all of the trials and tribulations that have come and gone in your life.

Set aside one hour today and go to a place where you can get away from everyone; from work, noise, etc. and pour your heart out to God.

A New Lifestyle Full Of Adventure

Taking On A New Lifestyle

Our family has adopted a lifestyle of wellness living that helps us emotionally thrive. I will share with you how you can improve your life. Are you ready to make a change?

Since, we are now focusing on what is best for us. I will share why this change may be best for you. It is my hope to provide you with hope and inspiration along the way.


Our new lifestyle will include nature-derived stories.

Ponder Your Choices

  • What is tugging at your heart for you to want to start living a new life?
  • Has something caused you to feel stumped and not know where to turn?
  • Do you know what your purpose is in this thing we call a human being?
  • When you were in your dreaming phase years what did you dream of being or doing in life?
  • What is stopping you from achieving your dreams?
  • Who are you and what were you created for?
  • Have you rid yourself of trying to live up to another person’s expectations?
  • What is keeping you from being a better person?
  • Are you a creative person, if so, what do you enjoy doing? Are you doing it? If not, why not?

Wellness Lifestyle

It’s time for a reset, so why not consider this particular time as a change that you will make within yourself because you want to and as if it was a new law of wellness living?

Learn how to adopt a healthy new lifestyle of living well by focusing on what helps you mentally thrive. Achieve a healthy way of living by changing your mindset.

We’re all struggling and desire a new life of wellness.

I am dedicated to giving you the best reality of what I call a new way of wellness living.

Finishing Well

There is a lot of information to process these days when it comes to motivation. The spark seems to go out many times as we try to relight or keep the candle lite at both ends because of the demands in our lives.

Starting Well

We must start well to finish well. This means sticking it out until it’s done. Learning to not lose heart of what truly matters and that is you. For instance, because dieting is a discipline we stay fat. We choose to bail because our discipline gets difficult.

We start with being enthusiastic, then disillusionment starts to set in. This causes us to panic and search out reasons to not move forward. Self-doubt, guilt, and low self-esteem set in. We start replaying the things we’ve heard over and over again. Our confusion has replaced our ability to conquer what we started to pursue.

Finding Strength

Where do you get your strength to keep going?

Then I gave them my report: “Face it: we’re in a bad way here. Jerusalem is a wreck; its gates are burned up. Come let’s build the wall of Jerusalem and not live with this disgrace any longer.” I told them how God was supporting me and how the king was backing me up. They said, “We’re with you. Let’s get started.” They rolled up their sleeves, ready for the good work. When Sanballat the Horonite, Tobiah the Ammonite official, and Gesham the Arab heard about it, they laughed at us, mocking, “Ha! What do you think you’re doing? Do you think you can cross the king?” I shot back, “The God-of-Heaven will make sure we succeed. We’re his servants and we’re going to work, rebuilding. You can stick to your own business. You get no say in this Jerusalem’s none of your business!”

The wall was finished on the twenty-fifth day of Elul. It had taken fifty-two days. When all our enemies heard the news and all the surrounding nations saw it, our enemies totally lost their nerve. They knew that God was behind this work.

Don’t be misled: No one makes a fool of God. What a person plants, he will harvest. The person who plants selfishness, ignoring the needs of others ignoring God! harvests a crop of weeds. All he’ll have to show for his life is weeds! But the one who plants in response to God, letting God’s Spirit do the growth work in him, harvests a crop of real life, eternal life. So, let’s not allow ourselves to get fatigued doing good. At the right time we will harvest a good crop if we don’t give up, or quit. Right now, therefore, everytime we get the chace, let us work for the benefit of all, starting with the people closest to us in the community of faith.

Looking Up

David thought to himself, “Sooner or later, Saul’s going to get me. The best thing I can do is escape to Philistine country. Saul will count me a lost cause and quit hunting me down in every nook and cranny of Israel. I’ll be out of his reach for good.” So David left; he and his six hundred men went to Achich son of Maoch, king of Gath. They moved in and settled down in Gath, with Achish. Each man brought his household; David brought his two wives, Ahinoam of Jezreel and Abigail, widow of Nabal of Carnel. When Saul was told that David had escaped to Gath, he called off the hunt. Then David said to Achish, “If it’s a agreeable to you, assign me a place in one of the rural villages. It doesn’t seem right that I, your mere servant, should be taking up space in the royal city.” So Achish assigned him Ziklag ( a city of the kings of Judah). David lived in Philistine country a year and four months.

After years of running because I was being chased with no indication that things would change in my life I began to despair. I moved from faith to human reasoning.

The fortunate thing is when we hit rock bottom there is a way back. I learned to focus on God’s word, attended bible study groups, and attended women’s events this helped me find my purpose, and I truly believe I have excelled since.

Don’t get me wrong life is not perfect and the enemy is there as soon as you stop striving. I constantly ask God for forgiveness and I pledge to follow Him.

Will you walk upon this same road that leads you upward?

Living It Up

Loosen the grip and learn to live it up. Deliberately get out there and have fun! Forget about being responsible, sensible, professional and even proper.

Let every detail in your lives – words, actions, whatever – be done in the name of the Master, Jesus, thanking God the Father every step of the way.

Wherever you are, be there in the moment.

These are the commands, decrees and laws the Lord your God directed me to teach you to observe in the land that you are crossing the Jordan to possess, so that you, your children and their children after them may fear the Lord your God as long as you live by keeping all his decrees and commands that I give you, and so that you may enjoy long life.

So David and the elders of Israel and the commanders of units of a thousand went to bring up the ark of the covenant of the Lord from the house of Obed-Edom, with rejoicing.Because God had helped the Levites who were carrying the ark of the covenant of the Lord, seven bulls and seven rams were sacrificed. Now David was clothed in a robe of fine linen, as were all the Levites who were carrying the ark, and as were the musicians, and Kenaniah, who was in charge of the singing of the choirs. David also wore a linen ephod. So all Israel brought up the ark of the covenant of the Lord with shouts, with the sounding of rams’ horns and trumpets, and of cymbals, and the playing of lyres and harps.

As the ark of the covenant of the Lord was entering the City of David, Michal daughter of Saul watched from a window. And when she saw King David dancing and celebrating, she despised him in her heart.

Ready and willing, the heads of families, leaders of the tribes of Israel, commanders and captains in the army, and stewards of the king’s affairs, stepped forward and gave willingly. They gave 5,000 talents (188 tons) and 10,000 darics (185 pounds) of gold, 10,000 talents of silver (377 tons), 18,000 talents of bronze (679 tons), and 100,000 talents (3,775 tons) of iron. Anyone who had precious jewels put them in the treasury for the building of The Temple of God in the custody of Jehiel the Gershonite. And the people were full of a sense of celebration—all that giving! And all given willingly, freely! King David was exuberant. David blessed God in full view of the entire congregation:
Blessed are you, God of Israel, our father from of old and forever. To you, O God, belong the greatness and the might, the glory, the victory, the majesty, the splendor; Yes! Everything in heaven, everything on earth; the kingdom all yours! You’ve raised yourself high overall. Riches and glory come from you, you’re ruler over all; You hold strength and power in the palm of your hand to build up and strengthen all. And here we are, O God, our God, giving thanks to you, praising your splendid Name.

“But me—who am I, and who are these my people, that we should presume to be giving something to you? Everything comes from you; all we’re doing is giving back what we’ve been given from your generous hand. As far as you’re concerned, we’re homeless, shiftless wanderers like our ancestors, our lives mere shadows, hardly anything to us. God, our God, all these materials—these piles of stuff for building a house of worship for you, honoring your Holy Name—it all came from you! It was all yours in the first place! I know, dear God, that you care nothing for the surface—you want us, our true selves—and so I have given from the heart, honestly and happily. And now see all these people doing the same, giving freely, willingly—what a joy! O God, God of our fathers Abraham, Isaac, and Israel, keep this generous spirit alive forever in these people always, keep their hearts set firmly in you. And give my son Solomon an uncluttered and focused heart so that he can obey what you command, live by your directions and counsel, and carry through with building The Temple for which I have provided.”

David then addressed the congregation: “Bless God, your God!” And they did it, blessed God, the God of their ancestors, and worshiped reverently in the presence of God and the king.

The very next day they butchered the sacrificial animals and offered in the worship of Israel to God a thousand bulls, a thousand rams, a thousand sheep, and in addition drink offerings and many other sacrifices. They feasted all day, eating and drinking before God, exuberant with joy.

Then they ceremonially reenacted Solomon’s coronation, anointing David’s son before God as their leader, and Zadok as priest. Solomon sat on the throne of God as king in place of David his father. And everything went well; all Israel obeyed him. All the leaders of the people, including all the sons of King David, accepted Solomon as their king and promised their loyalty. Solomon rode high on a crest of popular acclaim—it was all God’s doing. God gave him position and honor beyond any king in Israel before him.

David son of Jesse was king over all Israel. He ruled over Israel forty years—seven in Hebron and thirty-three in Jerusalem. He died at a good old age, having enjoyed long life, wealth and honor. His son Solomon succeeded him as king.


 “Listen to me, all you who are serious about right living and committed to seeking God. Ponder the rock from which you were cut, the quarry from which you were dug.


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A Healthy Perspective On How To Balance It All

The Edge Or The Hedge

The purpose of this post is to introduce a healthy perspective on how to balance it all using basic concepts and foundational understanding. Its like being on the edge of the hedge of understanding.

  • The Edge is the outside limit of an object, area, or surface; a place or part farthest away from the center of something like our being.
  • The Hedge limit or qualify (something) by conditions or exceptions (to be bound by or bordered around) our being.

I will share and breakdown a number of strategies to help you better understand managing and optimizing your mental and physical health. 

First, we must understand what it means to have balance and live a life that involves healthy choices diet, mental and physical exercise that will help us.

wake up and workout slogan on light box among sports equipment

Its Healthy To Balance It Out By Being Present

Our being should start with being present in the moments, the moments we have been given.

  • What is going on with you at this moment?
  • What is running through that head of yours?

Mental health includes emotional, psychological, and social matters. Our mental health affects how we think, feel, and act, how we make choices, and how we relate to others. 

Mental health is essential to balance and well-being in our lives.

Anxiety is an emotion characterized by feelings of tension and worried thoughts, often leading to physical changes like increased blood pressure and an intense feeling that overcomes your mind and body out of nowhere.

Thoughts we want to stop but because they’re running full speed we must learn how to put a stop to the thoughts in these moments that are causing us to be shaken.

  • What do you do to put a stop to the thoughts running ramped in your mind?

When we learn how to recognize these sensations (a feeling) running rapidly through our body. We will be able to start working on problem-solving immediately. Knowing, how it feels are the physical signs we sense (to become more aware of).

How we feel (physically) our body starts to tense up because of the situation (left unresolved) another name for it is a trigger (traumatic} event.

  • Awareness: A physical sign our muscles in our neck and shoulders tighten up.

Buried Alive

So what does it feel like to be buried and yet alive? It’s the thing living deep inside you that is wanting to come out yet, you keep it buried deep inside because, you don’t want it to cause you pain again.

  • When are you becoming aware of the signs that your body is telling you that something is affecting you deeply?

Stress and anxiety are very closely related. Anxiety is an emotion where we feel tense and have worried thoughts, often leading to physical changes in our body.

We all experience challenges and stress in our lives, but people who have learned how to resist or learned how to develop resilience are more able to bounce back quickly when they get triggered.

Resilient people feel that they are not victims of whatever happens to them and that they can actually take charge of their own lives. They can now make decisions to change their circumstances, instead of allowing circumstances in life to have control over them. 


When we say stress, we’re talking about mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from challenging circumstances.

Events, situations or pressures that cause you stress in life are called stressors.

  • A person’s condition with regard to their psychological and emotional well-being
  • Having resilience is the ability to withstand or recover quickly from stress or challenges; toughness
  • Stress is a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from challenging circumstances.
  • Stressors are events or pressures that cause stress in our lives
  • Work-Life Balance is the amount of time and energy you spend working relative to how much time and energy you spend on the rest of your life.

Who are you in all this?

People fall on a spectrum from introversion to extroversion. Introverts tend to need more time on their own to recharge their batteries, while extroverts tend to get more energy from spending time with others.

It’s useful for you to understand your own needs, and also helpful in relationships to understand where each person falls on this spectrum, so you can better understand and respect each other’s needs.

  • An Introvert is someone who tends to need more alone time to maintain a feeling of balance.
  • An Extrovert is someone who tends to need less alone time and instead prefers to recharge through spending time with others.

Finding A Healthy Balance

When faced with a stressful problem, you can seek the support of friends and family or learn coping skills to help you deal with matters at hand.

Learn to be more self-reliant by writing down your ideas in a journal, be sure to have the journal readily available at all times. Go through the problem-solving methods you have written down and re-examine what seems to have worked for you before and expand on that if need be. Soon you will be on your way to healing.

Life is so complex and most of us have so many responsibilities and it’s hard to keep up. We also face so many external and internal pressures daily. Sometimes, we need to be able to take a minute and just breathe. As you’re learning reflect and learn some new strategies for keeping your life in balance.

You may find it challenging to juggle the needs of your job, the needs of your family, your mental and physical health, your social life, and the other activities you enjoy doing in your life. Learning how to manage to do all of this without stressing out is what I call finding balance a positive feeling.

A Healthy Work-Life Balance 

A big challenge for many people is understanding the importance of work-life balance. How much time you spend working compared to how much time you spend on the rest of your life. If you feel you have this work-life imbalance, you are not alone!

Many people put in extra hours at work, because they want to do a good job, or because they are salaried employees. As a salaried employee you loose track of time because there is no time limit when it comes to the hours we work in order to complete a project.

Be cautious when it comes to your employer wanting to shift your hourly pay to salary pay. I had an employer that said my position was salary when it wasn’t a salaried position. I will share the outcome later on in another post.

Salaried positions should be project-based or non-existent. As a salaried employee, employers get away with paying you less money. I recommend you take a step back and calculate the time you spend getting your work done and the money you are paid to see how much you are actually worth to your employer.

Healthy Boundaries

The simplest step you can take to set boundaries at work is to speak to your manager about what isn’t working for you and what your personal needs are like; the hours you are expected to be available are interfering with your work-life balance.

You know your situation best, so find the right time and approach your boss or supervisor and share what has gone beyond the scope of your job and responsibilities.

Discuss the tasks you are often being asked to work on that are beyond your job description. This conversation may not feel comfortable. But, it could lead to gaining more respect and may even benefit others in the organization as well.

You may feel you’re receiving too many after-hours text messages, emails, or notifications because you are always on call they make this a rule for you because they paid for your phone or they reimburse you for your monthly phone expense.

Love-Its That’ll Fit Nicely In Place

  • Manage work stress by checking your email twice a day rather than getting a constant influx of notifications.
  • Turn off your phone when you’re with loved ones so you aren’t distracted from what’s happening in the present.
  • Distance yourself from someone who is emotionally needy and who takes advantage of you.
  • Tell friends to text or call before they come over rather than just popping in.

This is another important reason to set your work boundaries. I was told that because they pay a portion of my phone expense I am to be available 24/7. Make sure to communicate to your manager and team what is ok and not ok for you. 

Set boundaries for your time and space so you can take care of yourself. A boundary can be between you and another person, or it can be set up to protect your time so you can take care of yourself. Here are some common ways you can set up healthy boundaries in your life:

Balance It All The Way To Healthy

Take some time away from work and spend it with your family and friends, learning to relax may be difficult at first.

It’s easy to lose ourselves and understanding the losses that we will suffer with our family and friends is worse than losing our reason for staying at this particular job.

Each of us plays several roles in our lives. You are a family member, a friend, and a worker., you may also be a spouse or partner and you might also belong to a religious or spiritual community, participate in a social club, or sports team, or be involved in other leisure activities.

Calendar It – Your Worth It

It’s important to have time for yourself. If a date night with your partner is much needed or some other form of entertainment with friends is on your calendar, you’ll have something to look forward to and it will give you extra motivation to better manage your work time.

Some people like to keep regular time on their weekly schedule to do things like going to a movie, exercising, going to church, spending the afternoon at the park with their children, having a picnic, or even going for a hike. The goal is to spend quality time together by making this a top priority.

Maybe some of your shopping can be done using online platforms rather than you running out to the store. If you must run to the store make it a fun event by spending time together shopping together.

Yardwork seems to be the thing we do on the weekends maybe a young person on your street would love to make a little money caring for your yard.

If you find yourself doing all the cooking and cleaning, chores or errands for your home, maybe it’s time to ask others to step up and take on their fair share of things.

We shift between these roles throughout our lives and within each day. You juggle whatever your roles are, and when they feel balanced to you, you probably feel fulfilled and happy. However, when one role begins to override the others, we can feel stressed and out of sorts.  

Healthy Responsibilities and Expectations

Each role comes with various responsibilities and expectations. If we don’t fulfill any of our roles, there are consequences, like the loss of a relationship or loss of a job, so keeping them in balance is essential.  

At some times in our lives, one role will dominate the others. Maybe you have a sick family member that you need to spend special time with, or maybe one season calls for extra time at work. This can be okay as long as you’re aware that you are making this sacrifice for a short period.

It is helpful to communicate this with others and remember being flexible and accepting these short-term shifts will help you reduce your stress. 

Take Time For Yourself

Another aspect of balancing time relates to taking time for yourself, compared to spending time and energy with others. Everyone’s well-being depends to some degree on making some down time to take care of your health, relax and do things you enjoy.

Some people restore their spirits by engaging in private practices like prayer or meditation. Others may enjoy writing in a journal, developing their talents with a musical instrument, expressing their creativity through craftwork, or reading a book. 

Learn to say (no) so you don’t overcommit your time. When someone asks you to do something, take a minute to check in with your gut and then with your calendar to see if it’s a reasonable thing for you to agree to do. If it isn’t possible say to them (thanks for asking, but I’m going to have to pass this time).

  • A great question to ask yourself when you’re trying to decide if you should commit to something is, “If I say ‘yes’ to this opportunity, what am I saying ‘no’ to?”

Self-Care Is A Healthy Balance

You may find yourself overwhelmed with all your responsibilities for other people and neglect your own needs sometimes.

Self-Check List

  • Check-In With Yourself If you like journaling or keeping lists, spend a few minutes at the end of each day reflecting on what you are grateful for, what went well, how you felt, and anything that was upsetting. If you aren’t a fan of writing things down, take a couple of minutes to sit quietly and think about your day.

Ask yourself these types of questions:

What made me the happiest today, what are the positives going on in my life, what am I putting off or procrastinating? If I had time, what would I like to be doing? Is there negativity I can remove from my life?

  • Pamper Yourself– Hair masks, face masks, manicures, pedicures, relaxing baths, spa days, massages, and other similar activities are wonderful ways you can give your mind and body a little extra TLC. You can book an appointment with a professional, or enjoy doing things yourself at home.

Look Forward:

Try to do something special for yourself once a week so it’s something you can always look forward to.

  • Smell Good – Having good hygiene habits can help prevent health problems later down the road. Try to incorporate these different types of hygiene into your daily routine: Brush your teeth at least twice a day, floss once a day, and visit your dentist for a checkup once a year. Shower or take a bath and wear some form of deodorant every day. Wash your hands after you use the bathroom and before and after you handle food.


Your favorite scent: cologne, lotion, or perfume.

Check It Out

  • Cut It Out – Is thee a bad habit you can start cutting back on? make a list of the reasons why you want to stop doing this particular habit. Try replacing this bad habit with something that is good for you. Reward yourself for making a good choice. If its a bad addiction you may need to seek our help from a professional.
  • Seek It Out– Instead of focusing on the things you don’t have, choose to focus on what you do have. Commit to finding the good in every day. Listening to music, dancing, baking, cooking, reading, coloring, painting, yoga infuse these activities into your daily life. Laugh it out watch a funny show to watch.
  • Act It Out – Do something physical, like exercising, working on something outdoors that allows you to sweat it out. Dance it out or better yet yell it out loud in the middle of nowhere were no one is watching.


  • Sleep Soundly – Make sleep a number one priority well before bedtime starts. Have all your to do written out. Stop any caffeine by a certain time of the day. Read a good book or watch a good show to prevent bad dreams. Go to sleep at the same time every day to get your body into a routine. Set your alarm to a less alarming tone.

Wake Refreshed – Enhancement (an increase or improvement in quality, value, or extent). Live It Out

Build A Network

  1. Connect – Relationships are super important to our mental and to our emotional health. Don’t neglect friends even when your life gets busy. Reach out to others meet up for coffee at one another’s homes.
  2. Listen – Take the time and really listen.
  3. Walk & Talk – Schedule a time to meet up to walk and talk.
  4. Like-Minded Groups – Join other like minded people to do something you enjoy doing; hobby, sport, traveling, gym type classes
  5. Digitally – blogging platforms, bible studies, websites

Our Immune System

A complex network of cells, tissues, organs, and the substances they make helps the body fight infections and other diseases. Be aware of what your body is telling you. Are you immune enough to risk making yourself even sicker? Know that by pushing yourself you risk lowering your immune system and this will make you sick.

It’s common to feel a lot of pressure in these times. We have to learn how to push through and be more productive all the time even when our being is telling us to slow down. When you notice that you are feeling different, a little worn down learn to be intentional about setting yourself as precedence over anything else. Take the time and rest even if that means calling in sick, taking a mental day, canceling plans.

Our Affirmations

Pay attention to what that little voice in your head is saying to you. Self-doubt, insecurity, and even self-hate are common things that everyone deals with from time to time. Identify the things you are saying to yourself and about yourself, and replace those statements with positive affirmations.

If you often find yourself thinking, “I’m stupid, there’s no way I can do this,” try reframing that thought and say this, “It’s okay that this is hard, I can do hard things.”

Are you telling yourself bad things about your body or about who you are? Instead, focus on the things about yourself that you love or want to love. Instead of saying, “I’m so fat and ugly,” say, “My body is capable of wonderful things. I’m grateful for this body that God has given me to take care of.”

It can take a long time to stop talking about yourself negatively, so be patient with yourself.

Balance Your Healthy Diet

In general, the word diet means what you eat regularly. A different meaning is actually having and following an eating plan where you restrict what you eat for some reason or another. The purpose of a well-balanced diet may be to lose weight, live a healthier lifestyle, and/or reduce the chance of heart disease.

Instead of viewing foods as “good” or “bad,” focus on eating things that you know make your body feel better.

Eat more fruits, vegetables, protein, and calcium to help your body run better. If you have allergies or dietary restrictions, take those seriously.

Eating Healthy

If you struggle with eating what you want to eat, try making a meal plan for a week at a time. Write out what you want to eat for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks, and then go grocery shopping so you have everything you need.

Remember that there is nothing wrong with having a treat, whether that’s a big, juicy burger or a delicious piece of chocolate cake. Just remember to balance the treats with healthy options so your body doesn’t start to feel sluggish.

Make half your plate fruits and vegetables. Focus on eating whole fruits and vegetables because they are more filling. This leaves us with two quarters of a plate left to fill with protein and whole grains.

When it comes to a beverage I strive to drink water over anything else. If you need something more than a cold glass of refreshing water try drinking less sugary types of beverages.

Healthy Strategies To Help Reduce Stress

Try to catch yourself when you start to worry.  

Identify It – What Am I worrying about? Is it a realistic problem and can I do anything about it right now?

Imagine It – Imagine that your worry is a song that you are listening to in this moment. Know that you can change the song at anytime.

Convert it to replace something negative with something positive which in turn is more productive for us overall.

Once a worry is a concern, pose solutions that are actionable. Determine when you will be able to perform those actions, schedule them, and move on.

Laughter Makes You Feel Healthy

The old expression that laughter is the best medicine is true. Laughter serves as an antidote to the body’s stress response, as laughing releases endorphins (the pleasure hormones in your brain) counteract the hormonal effects of stress.

If you have a great sense of humor or work around people who do, you have a powerful weapon against stress. In fact, laughter can have positive effects on your overall health.

Meditation and Relaxation

A couple of basic meditation techniques, such as deep breathing, can help lessen your stress.

Practice deep breathing, simply breathe from your diaphragm. This can be performed by placing your hand just below your rib cage and above your stomach; your diaphragm will move up and down as you breathe.

Deep breathing lowers your heart rate and your blood pressure, sending oxygen into your blood and brain. It makes you feel calm and anchors you in the present. Moreover, you can practice deep breathing virtually any time you like even while at work.

Its amazing how hard it is to tell yourself to do something it naturally does on its own.

Being constantly connected to others can be a blessing and a curse, and sometimes it’s healthy to disconnect, ground yourself, and connect with the world around you. Try a day when you can literally unplug from all your digital devices.

Your mind will start to relax and you may even find that things that seemed overwhelming before are much more manageable than you thought.

Balance Healthy Out With Exercise

Exercise is one of the most common and effective methods to reduce stress. Even taking a short walk or climbing a flight of stairs can reduce stress and increase alertness.

A regular exercise routine can boost your mood, increase concentration, and help alleviate symptoms of anxiety and depression.

Stepping outside for a walk can also clear your mind and bring a change of perspective when you exercise.

To Be Healthy We Must Exercise

If you don’t already exercise 3-5 days a week try to add in several 30-minute workouts to your weekly routine.

Do something you enjoy, like walking, jogging, biking, weight lifting, swimming, or playing some kind of group sport like tennis. Your body will feel better, and the endorphins will boost your emotional health, too.

If you struggle with fitting in exercise, try scheduling it into your calendar so it is set in stone. Treat it like you would a doctor’s appointment or an important meeting.

“Use it or lose it!” should encourage us to use and move our bodies regularly, intentionally so we don’t prematurely lose the ability to use our bodies in the ways that we want and when we need our bodies to operate optimally.

  • Move more
  • Sit less
  • Do something that is physical
  • Walk
  • Do weight bearing exercises
  • Do muscle-strengthening activities

Balance Water With Exercise Leads To Feeling Healthy

The latest news on water is that drinking a cup of ice cold water first thing in the morning helps bring your body what it needs to start functioning right out of the gate. So, now that you are out of the gate it will be easier to drink most of your water during your exercise.

Why not get them done earlier in the day when you can’t put off the routine or your water intake. Later in the day, you will be able to reflect on what you accomplished already and free up your evening of sleeping with less peeing.

Your body depends on water to survive, of course. Being dehydrated can lead to a lack of energy and other effects like headaches. Drinking eight glasses of water a day, or 64 ounces, is a reasonable goal.

Some people may need less water, and others may need more, especially those who are sweating due to exercise or a hot, humid environment, or are sick, pregnant, or breast-feeding. I’ve heard that dividing your body weight in half is the amount of ounces of water you need to drink per day.

https://youtu.be/Dq9odPtHbcg: A Healthy Perspective On How To Balance It All

Professionals For When You Are Feeling Unhealthy

Seek professional help if you are experiencing severe or distressing mental health symptoms that have lasted two weeks or more. The following is taken from the National Institute for Mental Health’s article on Caring for Your Mental Health(opens in a new tab)


Symptoms That Are Not Healthy

Here are some distressing mental health symptoms you may be experiencing:

  • Difficulty sleeping
  • Appetite changes that result in unwanted weight changes
  • Struggling to get out of bed in the morning because of mood
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Loss of interest in things you usually find enjoyable
  • Inability to perform usual daily functions and responsibilities

Don’t wait until your symptoms are overwhelming. Talk about your concerns with a primary health care provider, who can refer you to a mental health professional if needed.

Maybe you need to ask a friend or family member for help, or maybe you need to see a professional for help with anxiety or depression.

There is no shame in admitting you need help remember that you are doing your best, and everyone needs help sometimes.

Ask For Help

Asking for help can be as simple as asking someone to help you with finishing a work project, buying groceries, or watching your child so you can have some alone time.

  • If your emotional and mental health is making it hard for you to get out of bed, or enjoy things you used to, call a professional to get the kind of help you need.

Much research has shown that eating well, exercising, and sleeping a good amount all play a significant role in our physical health, mental health, and well-being.  

What we eat regularly greatly affects how we feel and how our bodies and minds perform throughout our life activities and work.

Different people have different bodies and different ages and medical conditions, so our nutritional needs vary.